There is a scene in Pilot Season where entertainment lawyer Ken Fold asserts that being a lawyer is the profession closest to God. He claims that law is more worthwhile than medicine because lawyers can "help people AND destroy people"
I think this quote is so apt to anyone who has ever worked in customer service. Speaking for myself, I can honestly say that I enjoy interacting and helping friendly polite people....I will bust my ass in order to make sure they are satisfied. But I must add that I have given up on any semblance of "caring" about the interests of self-centered rude customers. I actively try to destroy them with "eye-rolls", sarcasm and inefficiency.
Having spent over a decade in customer service I can say that politeness level of the American public is plummeting rapidly. I would love to know exactly where these people have interactions where being a condescending prick elicits a speedy and warm response from a customer service rep...
Black or white, gay or straight, rich or poor...you really cannot accurately predict someone's behavior. I always try to give everyone the "benefit of the doubt" at the beginning of an interaction. I assume that they are going to behave as a mature citizen, and if so I will accord them the respect that they deserve. However if they come at me with disrespect, trust it, the gloves WILL come off.
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Saturday, May 28, 2005
Things I Love...
...lemon merengue pie...brand new underwear...Jorge Posada...when JR calls me "Matty"...letters from my Aunt Shirley...Anne Slater's eyeglasses...
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
The Look For Summer 2005
I've decided that "The Look" for this summer is "1950's Greaser vs. Suburban Soccer Dad"...Photos to follow, once all the kinks are worked out.
Monday, May 23, 2005
Dreaming of Pele
So I woke up at 5 in the morning having had a terrifying dream. I was wandering in a plush suburban neighborhood circa 1964. The day was rainy and all the vegetation was lushly green.
In the dream I learn that there is a Mexican family in the neighborhood that is being harassed by someone nearby. The harrassment consists of mocking the soccer playing ability of the Mexican family's young son. They are calling him "Pele" which leads the boy to believe that the harrassment is actually a compliment.
All of the sudden I begin running very fast in the neighborhood...I am not running away from anything or anyone...just running very fast and efficiently. I then come around a corner and I see the Mexican family's house which has been painted with amateurish graffitti. In the dream I get an incredibly sick feeling in my stomach and find myself running through a thorn bush. I am able to pull most of the thorns out effortlessly, but there is one thorn under my fingernail that will not come out. I pull on it hard and the pain is so intense that I wake myself up.
I rarely have nightmares and I will admit that this was not the most terrifying on record, but for some reason when I woke up I was "haunted"...It felt like my ego had "burst" and all self-esteem had been sucked out of me.
In the dream I learn that there is a Mexican family in the neighborhood that is being harassed by someone nearby. The harrassment consists of mocking the soccer playing ability of the Mexican family's young son. They are calling him "Pele" which leads the boy to believe that the harrassment is actually a compliment.
All of the sudden I begin running very fast in the neighborhood...I am not running away from anything or anyone...just running very fast and efficiently. I then come around a corner and I see the Mexican family's house which has been painted with amateurish graffitti. In the dream I get an incredibly sick feeling in my stomach and find myself running through a thorn bush. I am able to pull most of the thorns out effortlessly, but there is one thorn under my fingernail that will not come out. I pull on it hard and the pain is so intense that I wake myself up.
I rarely have nightmares and I will admit that this was not the most terrifying on record, but for some reason when I woke up I was "haunted"...It felt like my ego had "burst" and all self-esteem had been sucked out of me.
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Before Frankie (B.F.) and After Frankie (A.F.)
Today I am celebrating the 10th anniversary of a night that changed my life. On May 19th 1995, on the suggestion of my brother Stan, Cain and I went to Sound Factory Bar to dance to Frankie Knuckles. We were vacationing in NYC at the time and I had never heard the Godfather of House before.
I did not know what I was in for when I walked through the doors of 12 west 21st. The music was so refreshingly clean and positive I instantly had perma-grin. The beats were relentlessly awesome. Then at 3:45am (yes I know, technically the 20th of May) Frankie dropped what I later learned was "Satisfied (Take It Higher)" by H20 feat. Billie.
I am the first to admit that I overuse the phrase "mind-blowing"...but at that moment my mind was blown. In that moment I glimpsed my future. I needed to move to NYC. I needed to have access to a dancefloor with Frankie behind the decks.
The power and gorgeous positivity of the music opened up possibilities in my mind and my heart.
My move to NYC did not happen for two years. But I must say that I was propelled to make the difficult concrete decision to move here by the idea that I would be able to return to Frankie's dancefloor on a regular basis. That was my motivator.
In May of 1997 I took an exploratory vacation to the city before my eventual, permanent move in October. Frankie was playing a club on 28th between 7th and 8th (can't remember the name of the short-lived place) and I got a chance to meet the legend. He could not have been more sweet and genuine to a complete stranger such as myself who was prattling on like a madman about how my life had been changed by my exposure to his talent.
Ten years later, I still think about that moment every time I hit the dancefloor when Frankie is spinning. Every time Frankie spins it is magic. It is a gift of positive energy from the universe...Thank you Frankie and all the people who turn it out on the dancefloor....You ARE the party.
I did not know what I was in for when I walked through the doors of 12 west 21st. The music was so refreshingly clean and positive I instantly had perma-grin. The beats were relentlessly awesome. Then at 3:45am (yes I know, technically the 20th of May) Frankie dropped what I later learned was "Satisfied (Take It Higher)" by H20 feat. Billie.
I am the first to admit that I overuse the phrase "mind-blowing"...but at that moment my mind was blown. In that moment I glimpsed my future. I needed to move to NYC. I needed to have access to a dancefloor with Frankie behind the decks.
The power and gorgeous positivity of the music opened up possibilities in my mind and my heart.
My move to NYC did not happen for two years. But I must say that I was propelled to make the difficult concrete decision to move here by the idea that I would be able to return to Frankie's dancefloor on a regular basis. That was my motivator.
In May of 1997 I took an exploratory vacation to the city before my eventual, permanent move in October. Frankie was playing a club on 28th between 7th and 8th (can't remember the name of the short-lived place) and I got a chance to meet the legend. He could not have been more sweet and genuine to a complete stranger such as myself who was prattling on like a madman about how my life had been changed by my exposure to his talent.
Ten years later, I still think about that moment every time I hit the dancefloor when Frankie is spinning. Every time Frankie spins it is magic. It is a gift of positive energy from the universe...Thank you Frankie and all the people who turn it out on the dancefloor....You ARE the party.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
A Gentle Reminder...
...To Bill Frist, the republican leadership and the 12% of the americans who want the "nucular option" to go forward:
Payback Is A Bitch!
Payback Is A Bitch!
Contact High
A couple of months ago I noticed on the DefMix website that Frankie Knuckles was going to play the End Up in San Francisco. Half seriously I suggested to my sister Ann that she would soon be visited by the Godfather of House and she should try to make it to the party.
After all she has had to hear me praise Mr. Knuckles for years and since she has a pied-a-terre in San Francisco, there was no reason she shouldn't expose herself to the master.
Needless to say, I had my doubts that she would make it happen...not to say that she is not a woman of her word, just that I wouldn't have expected her to go out of her way in order to feed into my obsession with Frankie...
I won't soon forget her phone call on Saturday afternoon telling me about the awesomeness of the party. It is not everyday that a 52 year old woman will be at the club until 5am dancing to the Legend himself, (in fact my sister guesstimates that it has been 2 decades since she has been in a club)...but it is a testament to the positive vibes that are created when Frankie is behind the wheels. EVERYONE is welcome on the dancefloor
After all she has had to hear me praise Mr. Knuckles for years and since she has a pied-a-terre in San Francisco, there was no reason she shouldn't expose herself to the master.
Needless to say, I had my doubts that she would make it happen...not to say that she is not a woman of her word, just that I wouldn't have expected her to go out of her way in order to feed into my obsession with Frankie...
I won't soon forget her phone call on Saturday afternoon telling me about the awesomeness of the party. It is not everyday that a 52 year old woman will be at the club until 5am dancing to the Legend himself, (in fact my sister guesstimates that it has been 2 decades since she has been in a club)...but it is a testament to the positive vibes that are created when Frankie is behind the wheels. EVERYONE is welcome on the dancefloor
Monday, May 16, 2005
Some Of The Things I Believe...
...I believe humility and modesty are sexy...I believe our nation is "on the wrong course"...I believe in the power of obsessions...I believe in destiny...I believe there is a bit of humor in every situation...I believe art education should be as important as math in our schools...I believe in reincarnation...I believe people are inherently good...I believe daydreaming is a valuable activity...I believe in Rupaul's quote "we are born naked...the rest is drag"...I believe a civilized nation does not have capital punishment...I believe in "live and let live"...I believe regret can be toxic...I believe the most important thing you can teach a child is to be curious...I believe in minimalism in everything except emotions...I believe that anyone who thinks they have "good taste" is wrong...I believe there was calculated voter fraud in Ohio...I believe in rooting for the underdog...I believe you can get spiritual enlightenment on a dancefloor...I believe there is an element of truth in every stereotype...I believe good design can alleviate stress...I believe in gut feelings...I believe you can judge a person's character by what they DON'T say as much as by what they DO say...I believe in exfoliating the skin and the soul...I believe
Thursday, May 12, 2005
High School Jesus
TRIO just had an old David Letterman rerun from Oct '86. One of the guest was John Waters promoting his book Crackpot. I was instantly reminded of how I devoured that book when it came out. I remember sitting in social studies class and reading Crackpot in lieu of the required text.
I remember my friend Brian and I trading quotes back and forth from the book and laughing hysterically. It is no understatement to say that that is one of the books that truly changed my life. John Water's attitude and skewed perspective were manna from heaven to a teenager who was afraid of suffocating from the boredom and bullshit that was/is high school in a small midwestern city.
I remember my friend Brian and I trading quotes back and forth from the book and laughing hysterically. It is no understatement to say that that is one of the books that truly changed my life. John Water's attitude and skewed perspective were manna from heaven to a teenager who was afraid of suffocating from the boredom and bullshit that was/is high school in a small midwestern city.
Andy Warhol Was Wrong
I have had the last two days off from work...I was going to write that they were undelightfully unproductive, but a quick mental review revealed my time off as being very worthwhile yet having little materially to show for it. Got to a couple of galleries, talked to my friend Joyce in Chicago, had some cocktails with Jessica (plus some very necessary kvetching time with her), caught up on some e-mail, picked up some books at the library...damn, now that I think about it my time was very productive, even if it wasn't in the direction I intended.
Just had dinner with Cain around the corner at Baluchi's. We had a very worthwhile conversation coupled with some suprisingly good saag paneer. The initial question du jour was "What barriers are there in your life?" That lead to topics such as "destiny vs. freewill" and "fantasy vs. reality" plus other important issues such as contemporary furniture design and the wardrobes of teenagers who play D&D...(still trying to scour that last one from my brain)
I was reminded again of a couple of ideas that I sometimes "forget". First it is really valuable for me to verbalize ideas. So often I get caught up with thoughts marinating in my head. The simple act of talking about a concept gives a necessary perspective shift that allows me to decide the merit of my thoughts and opinions. I get to evaluate if things make sense outside of my brain.
Also I was reminded that when you have a "deep" conversation with someone, there is no bottom on the well of "deepness". No matter how well you know a person you can always be suprised by their personhood...how it evolves, morphs, adapts. Andy Warhol's quote about HIS persona comes to mind...he said that "if you scratch the surface, there is just more surface." Obviously this is not applicable to most people. If you dig into the depths of who they are...there is just more depth
Just had dinner with Cain around the corner at Baluchi's. We had a very worthwhile conversation coupled with some suprisingly good saag paneer. The initial question du jour was "What barriers are there in your life?" That lead to topics such as "destiny vs. freewill" and "fantasy vs. reality" plus other important issues such as contemporary furniture design and the wardrobes of teenagers who play D&D...(still trying to scour that last one from my brain)
I was reminded again of a couple of ideas that I sometimes "forget". First it is really valuable for me to verbalize ideas. So often I get caught up with thoughts marinating in my head. The simple act of talking about a concept gives a necessary perspective shift that allows me to decide the merit of my thoughts and opinions. I get to evaluate if things make sense outside of my brain.
Also I was reminded that when you have a "deep" conversation with someone, there is no bottom on the well of "deepness". No matter how well you know a person you can always be suprised by their personhood...how it evolves, morphs, adapts. Andy Warhol's quote about HIS persona comes to mind...he said that "if you scratch the surface, there is just more surface." Obviously this is not applicable to most people. If you dig into the depths of who they are...there is just more depth
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
A Translator?
The boy who works at the front desk at my gym is always flirting with me. Today's interaction was surprising. After asking me if I spoke any foreign languages he then stated that "You look like you could be a translator at the UN." How someone could look like a translator is far beyond me...but I am not going to turn down a compliment...and trust me "Meet me in the steamroom" is understood in any language.
Monday, May 09, 2005
Sunday, May 08, 2005
Reconnecting
Yesterday I hung out with my friend Nicci and her husband Chris. I knew Nicci back in Nebraska and she was making her first appearance in NYC.
I had met Chris momentarily a couple of years ago...not even long enough to make an impression. Although I don't know his exact title, he works in some capacity with the Air Force. It is so awesome when you spend time with someone who, on the surface, you have very little in common with but you still have a great interaction . Chris, I discovered, has a quality that is increasingly rare these days...he is "decent". I know that sounds like an underwhelming compliment, but as anyone who works in customer service will tell you there are tons of petty, rude, oblivious people out there.
As for Nicci, it was wonderful spending a couple of hours with her. Our conversation had a great balance between delightful nostalgia and delightful current topics in our lives. Her sense of humor just blows me away...she can literally make me cackle.
I had met Chris momentarily a couple of years ago...not even long enough to make an impression. Although I don't know his exact title, he works in some capacity with the Air Force. It is so awesome when you spend time with someone who, on the surface, you have very little in common with but you still have a great interaction . Chris, I discovered, has a quality that is increasingly rare these days...he is "decent". I know that sounds like an underwhelming compliment, but as anyone who works in customer service will tell you there are tons of petty, rude, oblivious people out there.
As for Nicci, it was wonderful spending a couple of hours with her. Our conversation had a great balance between delightful nostalgia and delightful current topics in our lives. Her sense of humor just blows me away...she can literally make me cackle.
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Ma Vie En Rose
I was just reviewing my profile. I noticed that I put "Ma Vie en Rose" as one of my favorite movies and indeed it is. Now that I think about it, it has probably been 3 years since I last saw it.
When it first came out I had just moved to New York. I was still living with Stan and Jim at the time. It was playing at the Quad and in the first week it played there I saw it 5 times (yes five paid movie admissions at New York City prices). I hate it when people brag about how many times they have seen a movie in a theater as if it is some sort of badge of courage...
From the first time I saw it I could not get enough of it...it so totally spoke to me regarding that feeling of being "an outsider". Couple that with the candy-colored visuals and I was hooked. I often have to "check myself" regarding that "outsider" feeling, it is kind of a theme running through my life, and yet I have to work hard not to associate that feeling with a sense of "specialness" or self-worth. Being an outsider is no better or worse than being, for lack of a better term, an insider...it is only one of a variety of ways to look at your relationship to society.
That being said, my (real or imagined) sense of not fitting in has created some great opportunities in my life. It got me out of Nebraska, plus it made me curious about marginalized people/things/ideas. For that I am grateful.
When it first came out I had just moved to New York. I was still living with Stan and Jim at the time. It was playing at the Quad and in the first week it played there I saw it 5 times (yes five paid movie admissions at New York City prices). I hate it when people brag about how many times they have seen a movie in a theater as if it is some sort of badge of courage...
From the first time I saw it I could not get enough of it...it so totally spoke to me regarding that feeling of being "an outsider". Couple that with the candy-colored visuals and I was hooked. I often have to "check myself" regarding that "outsider" feeling, it is kind of a theme running through my life, and yet I have to work hard not to associate that feeling with a sense of "specialness" or self-worth. Being an outsider is no better or worse than being, for lack of a better term, an insider...it is only one of a variety of ways to look at your relationship to society.
That being said, my (real or imagined) sense of not fitting in has created some great opportunities in my life. It got me out of Nebraska, plus it made me curious about marginalized people/things/ideas. For that I am grateful.
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